The Question of Loyalty
Loyalty seems like a quality that's becoming increasingly
hard to find, whether it's employee loyalty to a company, consumer
loyalty to a product or loyalty among family and friends. Although
loyalty seems to be fading, it isn't gone; many people still
feel a sense of loyalty to the people, country and organizations
in their lives. The important thing to know about loyalty is
that trust is the cornerstone of loyalty.
Loyalty is a symbiotic relationship based on mutual
benefit. It is very difficult to receive loyalty when loyalty
is not given. According to Dr. Paul T. P. Wong, "Loyalty
is born out of a reciprocal relationship and mutual trust. It
is difficult to remain loyal, when loyalty is not reciprocated.
It would be difficult to continue a relationship after the betrayal
of a trusted friend." Without loyalty it would be challenging
for any relationship to survive long-term. Loyalty is the foundation
of all healthy, trustworthy and long-lasting relationships.
For years I thought commitment was one of my core
values. It is important for me to do what I say I will do, keep
my word and stand by the people in my life. But I have lately
been re-examining my sense of commitment and I now realize that
what I really value is loyalty. What is important isn't just
my commitment to others but, also, theirs to me. I expect people
to keep their word, be trustworthy and stand by me. I expect
loyalty, of which commitment is a part, but loyalty is a much
deeper quality and goes both ways. A former friend became former
due to her lack of loyalty. She had a nasty habit of gossiping
about me and telling others everything I told her. The final
act was when we were at a party, and she began berating me in
front of others. In my value structure, friends do not gossip
about one another, nor do they exploit or misuse their loyalty.
Loyalty, it seems to me, is very delicate. It
can takes years to build, but only minutes to destroy. To create
loyalty, one must be willing to be loyal. Although there is
risk in being loyal, there is a much greater risk in not being
willing to extend loyalty. Without being a loyal person, one's
chances of finding others who demonstrate loyalty are slim.
According to Dr. Wong, "The audacious quest for true human
worth cannot end without finding authentic loyalty. Blessed
are those who have discovered it. Life is worth living when
there are trustworthy friends and larger causes deserving our
Coach Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, PhD provides daily motivation,
information and inspiration to thousands of busy self development
enthusiast who want to stay focused and on track to their goals
through her award winning e-zine 365 Days of Coaching. For a
free report, "The Power of Daily Action - How to create
more Wealth, Health and Happiness by Tapping Into the Power
of Daily Action" go to http://www.365daysofcoaching.com/daily_action.htm.
2005 True Direction, Inc.